Let's Write About Writing About Sex

(Caution: the following blog contains the word “sex” and has some sexual references. Readers’ discretion is advised. If you are easily offended, then you really must ask yourself what you’re doing reading this blog at all.)

To begin at the beginning . . . No, it is too much. Let me sum up.

Lately, I have been thinking about my job and thinking about money. The former analysis comes pretty much every time my boss makes me cry (most recently yesterday). Then I think about money and remember why I don’t just quit my job. I also realize that no one is going to hire a woman who is 6 months pregnant. We have one child to support and another child on the way. I have a parental need to provide. Jeff works for a grand organization, a huge ice cream company that was purchased by an even larger ice cream company that has decided to save money by cutting down his hours. A brilliant corporate strategy, especially considering that Jeff’s boss, who makes more money, must then take up the slack. Of course when said boss is on vacation, Jeff is expected to work insanely long days, as he is doing this week, but, then, will go back to his 32 hour work week. Ridiculous. Since we are relying on his insurance to get us through the birthin’ of this baby, he is stuck where he is for now.

I have wanted to be a writer since I was 8 years old. I have never really seriously considered any other career possibilities, which could be why I am working away as an assistant to a very prickly man. I always imagined that I would go to college and have wonderful adventures and write every day and get published. I pictured On the Road-type writings, without the need for Dramamine. Well, suffice to say, life happened, long stretches where no writing occurred and other stretches where I would only write poetry. I have always been a voracious reader and love well-written books where I can just fall into the language, the sound of words, and the images. It has always been a matter of frustration to me that I read enough to think that I am a good writer (at the very least, an adequate writer), but aspire to be a great one. I don’t know if one can make that leap from “good” to “great.”

Still, I have never really let go of the writing dream, the fantasy of one day seeing myself as a “real” writer. Lately, I have been thinking, too, about erotica, trying to determine whether this writing qualifies as “real” writing. I think that if it could provide a paycheck, then, yes it qualifies. Well-written sexual tomes exist amongst the piles of putrid, barely-written piles of garbage that are also floating around. (Yes, on this subject alone I was willing to dig in and do much-needed research. I am grateful to Jeff for the grand sacrifices he made in allowing me to complete this research.) General I have one of two thoughts when I am doing research: If the material is well written, I think ‘I would like to try that.’ If the material is not, I think ‘I could write something better than this.’

My research has also shown that there is a market for such writing. There are erotica publishers who pay for erotic writing. So, I have been wrestling with the idea of trying my hand at writing about sex. Yes, I have written short stories and several poems about sex, but that isn’t the same as churning out an entire novel complete with characters and a plot. I have been working on a novel that contains some sex, but overall, I am attempting to write a funny book, not necessarily a sexy one (though the ending was always intended to be sexy). But I have never written anything where sex was the primary focus. I have decided that it is time to try. I have been kicking around some ideas and have even thought about trying to “sex up” my current novel with sexy sex instead of funny and fun sex. I’ll keep you updated on my progress. I think I need to do a bit more research before committing to a project, so I must be going. Professionalism comes at a price, but I am willing to do what I must.