Are You A Good Story or a Bad Story?

I had very noble intentions when I began this blog. It was going to be this huge creative outlet, somewhere I could write and think and express on a consistent basis and most of all, it would be fun. Well, this blog has turned out to be all those things, but I sometimes wonder: is it any good? Should it matter whether it is any good? I have opinions on the matter and since this is my outlet, I will express said opinions here.

First, once one has created something, it is impossible to be objective about that something, whether it is a song or a painting or a blog. Or even a someone. I tend to think that my children (one-half of whom is represented here)



are art, though less art that has been created than art that is. Children are art that is freedom and beauty, creative in a way I never could be. (Photo borrowed from a blog much more picturesque than mine.)

Much of my good story/bad story internal debate stems from the fact that I am writing a novel. Have been writing a novel for many years, though have really gotten serious about it lately. I have analyzed and agonized over the language. I have tried to make something funny and interesting. Whether it is either (or both) I can no longer judge. I lack any kind of perspective over it. I have read and reread, have laughed and cringed over the language. Is it even mediocre, these pages I have written and rewritten so furiously? And mediocrity would be determined by whom?

Weighty issues, these, that press upon my mind and invade my sleep. Such thoughts are not helped by my love of Mystery Science Theater 3000. But while I laugh hysterically at the cruel comments heaped upon the bad, bad movies (and I honestly haven't seen one yet that wouldn't qualify as "bad" in my own humble opinion), I can't help but wonder if any of these films were made with sincere effort. Were there writers and directors who gathered together, agonized over a script as I have done with my own pages and who tried to put together the best movie they could? Do the MST3K movies represent someone's best attempts? And now that sincere effort is mocked mercilessly as the basis of a television show. Are there writers hunched over computers writing in blogs such as these defending their own works, determined to let the world see that their works are not so bad?

I cannot control how anyone else feels about my book. I can't even, it seems, control how I feel about it. I need to relinquish this paralyzing fear of being judged and just let the writing -- good or bad -- speak for iteself.